So, maybe 2 minutes passed, and she took me and one of the two other girls into the restroom. She didn't get right up in our business, like most people say. Then again, different MEPS have different personnel, so who knows? Well, she handed us each a cup, told us to fill it at least halfway, set it on the floor when we were finished, do our "thing" then pick the cup up. We had to keep it above waist level while carrying it over to the window. The tech in there did a pregnancy test, which I said there would be something wrong if mine was positive! As I mentioned earlier, I had just gotten off of my period, about 3 weeks previously, ha! Well, they did that then sent us on our way.
OH!! Somewhere in the middle of all of this, we went into a briefing. That's where we filled out our medical questionnaires, and they informed us of the rules for doing so. They also performed a breathalyzer, my first ever! It took about an hour or so.
So after the pee test, I went and took my vision test. I wear contacts, so I had to do 2 tests; one with contacts, one without. I did a basic test like at an eye doctor, then we moved to the depth perception and color blind tests. It actually seemed to take a while to do this, but probably because I had to do each twice. Bummer. Anyway, I finished that, and was directed into another room for *drumroll* the Underwear Olympics!! I almost feel like this topic needs its' very own post, but I won't do that. =] So I go into that room, where one of the other girls was already waiting. I sat beside her, and she told me she had been waiting in there for about 30 minutes or so. I was lucky enough to not wait any longer for anything for more than 5 minutes, other than swearing in, which I'll get to. So we waited on my roomie, since we were the only females. She arrived almost immediately. We went into the stalls located on the left side of the room, and undressed to our skivvies. No socks, though! Luckily, our tech knew how cold it was (even though she was in her ABU's!) so she provided 2 space heaters, which we flocked to like starving mice. She called us each up to get weighed and measured. I was first, of course. This was the moment I had been most nervous for, anxiously sweating about. I stepped on that scale and saw 142. Phew! I still had 3 pounds to spare! She had me step off the scale and stand against the wall to be measured. She measured me right at 5'2" like we had hoped for!! I knew from then on out, everything else would be a breeze. I didn't care that I had already passed all my other exams, this was the one I had been killing myself for for over two weeks. Sweet, sweet victory was mine. Back on track: she then weighed and measured the other two, then called us over to her little stand to inspect our tattoos/scars/birthmarks. Here's another mythbuster: They won't disqualify you for basic scars. I had heard this repeatedly. No matter what kind of scar, you'd be DQ'd. I found this to be appalling! How do they expect any person to not be a Jake Gyllenhall character, and not get scars?! It's called life! Of course, they do DQ for certain scars. If they could present a problem in the future, like if they're really big and deep or something. Cooking scars, scars from when you were 5 and fell off your bike and scraped your knee don't count. You can now relax. All tattoos have to be documented. If you have a full sleeve comprised of 27 tattoos, you have to go through each and every one (which you should have already done with your recruiter, but of course have to do it again to make sure you didn't add any). She had to document what it was, the size, and meaning of it. Mine are very simple, so it took just a couple of minutes.(Side note: I'm going to dedicate a post to tattoos and the Air Force.) Anyway, here comes the fun!!!
The Underwear Olympics
At this point, our tech brought the doctor in. We did a series of stretches/exercises so he could see what our range of motion is. Also, you were in your skivvies throughout the weighing/measuring and bodily identifiers. Anyway, he checked out our spine, bottoms of our feet, joint use, etc. They don't look too much into it if you have awful balance when doing this. They realize not everyone is an Olympic Gymnast. After we completed all of this, we did the infamous duckwalk. Oh, I would practice walking at least 5 paces on your tippy toes and heels if you can't already do this. Anyway, duckwalk. Right. The key to the duckwalk is to do exactly as they say. I was rather nervous about this just hearing about it, but it was SO easy. Firstly, you squat into like a backcatcher in baseball stance. Your butt should be resting our your heels. We could either place our hands on our waist, or in the crook of our hips. I opted for waist, because I felt like I was pushing down on my legs by putting them on the hips. You then begin to literally waddle. You MUST walk heel to toe while doing this. We only did 5 paces one way, turned around, 5 paces back, and turned around again before standing. No big deal, I promise. After that we did this weird thing where we got on our knees in a classic kneeling position, resting kind of on the toes. You had to roll back onto your heels, then roll your body up without balancing yourself on the floor, or your own body. I accidentally bounced up the first time, which you can't do. But I did get another try. You're not DQ'd for that either. That was it for the Underwear Olympics. Again, no big deal!
After that, the tech gave us dressing gowns and instructed us to put them on with the opening in the front. We walked into a smaller room connected to the room we were in for the female exam. I, again, was first. I guess because I was oldest and had "more experience" with these types of things. I was the only one of us all to have had a pap smear before. Weird. Anyway, when I entered the room, I walked over to the doctor so he could check my ears/eyes/nose. I also had to hold my nose and blow to pop my ears since I'm joining the AF. John didn't have to do this, though. Which I found odd. That took maybe 5 minutes, then I saddled up. (Because of the stirrups...get it? Maybe not...) The tech laid a sheet over me, and the doctor started the exam. He pressed on my tummy, which made me giggle because I'm ticklish. They laughed at me, too. =] Then was the "vaginal" exam. Basically all he did was lift the sheet to verify I was female. I counted, and it was less than 2 seconds. I kid you not! Then he did a standard breast exam, and I was done! I had passed my medical exam, and was ready to process out of there, and go to my liaison for job selection interview.
I think I'll now break this up into 3 parts. This is why I chose a blog instead of YouTube. You'd be watching this video for DAYS. =]
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